In continuation of my last post, I wanted to talk more about what you can do about bullying. I found this article, Creating a Cyber-Shield Through Parenting and Awareness, on Huffington Post which is directed at parents in particular, but it's a good read for all of us.
Huffington Post has a number of articles surrounding the topic of bullying and this one discusses cyberbullying. Since the beginning of social media, there have been cyberbullies. Whether it be Facebook, Twitter, of even here on Blogger. Bullies still say hurtful things in person, but it's become more prevalent to throw even more lashes online. What can you do about it?
The article linked here talks about parents being a "cyber-shield' for their children. Personally, I believe this is a great way to monitor what your children are saying and receiving. There is however, a right and wrong way to do this. As children are growing older, they should be allowed to make decisions on their own, but at the same time be mindful. I love the fact that this piece gives examples and advice to parents in order for them to be a cyber-shield and cyber-role model for their kids.
Growing up, I'm glad I wasn't on Facebook. I was more of a reader and enjoyed playing soccer in my downtime. Even so, keeping young kids away from social media might not be such a bad road to take. The younger they are, the more susceptible they are. While they are in high school, even though bullies can be more vicious here, giving them access to social media, but being a cyber-shield can be beneficial. This gives the tweens and teens ability to talk to one another and share ideas, pictures, videos and even articles. There are some things that texting just isn't capable of doing.
Granted, I don't have kids of my own right now, but I hope when I get to that point I will be able to be an effective cyber-shield for my children. All it takes is for the parent/guardian to understand the implications of bullying and be willing to take the time to teach their child how to behave in person as well as online. It can start with YOU! What will you do in the fight against bullying?
--Ruth Jackson
Wednesday, November 12, 2014
It Can Start with YOU
Hello everyone! For those of you in school, it's almost halfway until the end of first semester!
Today, I wanted to talk more about what you can do to stop bullies in their tracks. I found National Education Association (NEA) a couple days ago that talks specifically about what educators and teachers can do about bullying. Many schools are advocating for a bully-free school zone, but until teachers and administrators take action, that thought is just a thought.
Looking back at my growing up years in school, I wish the adults in my life took a stand against the bullies that kept attacking me. Some thought I would learn to overcome adversity through all this, but even though I can sense that what I went through made me stronger and stand up for myself, having someone around who cared and wanted to help would have made such a difference. This is why whenever I see someone else being bullied, I make my presence known. NEA's president Lily Eskelsen Garcia explains, "I hope to never hear an educator or parent or a Sunday School teacher say to a frightened bullied child, 'Just ignore it.' School that are seeing a decrease in bullying are no ignoring it. They are acting."
I'll admit, I'm a no nonsense kind of girl and I take bullying seriously because I know what it's like. Whether or not you know what it's like to be bullied, take a stand and let that kid know he/she is not alone. Help them build confidence. Even if no one else is standing by their side, it can start with you.
Ignoring the issue is not the solution. Facing it head on and being a verbal/active advocate makes the difference. You don't have to be the hero in the moment, even if you just acknowledge what happened afterwards you will be doing the right thing. You can send a simple text message, or just let the person know that you saw what happened and you don't think it is okay.
Check out the website I linked above. Make a difference and let it start with YOU!
--Ruth Jackson
Today, I wanted to talk more about what you can do to stop bullies in their tracks. I found National Education Association (NEA) a couple days ago that talks specifically about what educators and teachers can do about bullying. Many schools are advocating for a bully-free school zone, but until teachers and administrators take action, that thought is just a thought.
Looking back at my growing up years in school, I wish the adults in my life took a stand against the bullies that kept attacking me. Some thought I would learn to overcome adversity through all this, but even though I can sense that what I went through made me stronger and stand up for myself, having someone around who cared and wanted to help would have made such a difference. This is why whenever I see someone else being bullied, I make my presence known. NEA's president Lily Eskelsen Garcia explains, "I hope to never hear an educator or parent or a Sunday School teacher say to a frightened bullied child, 'Just ignore it.' School that are seeing a decrease in bullying are no ignoring it. They are acting."
I'll admit, I'm a no nonsense kind of girl and I take bullying seriously because I know what it's like. Whether or not you know what it's like to be bullied, take a stand and let that kid know he/she is not alone. Help them build confidence. Even if no one else is standing by their side, it can start with you.
Ignoring the issue is not the solution. Facing it head on and being a verbal/active advocate makes the difference. You don't have to be the hero in the moment, even if you just acknowledge what happened afterwards you will be doing the right thing. You can send a simple text message, or just let the person know that you saw what happened and you don't think it is okay.
Check out the website I linked above. Make a difference and let it start with YOU!
--Ruth Jackson
Focus on the Bullies
Today I want to shift our perspective. For awhile, I've been talking about being bullied. This time I want to discuss the bully.
I found this article to be quite fascinating: Overcoming Bullying and Depression. While it is long, I'm only going to talk about the first few paragraphs in particular. Personally, I was surprised at the statistics and research results from Education.com. The article explains that the bully and the bullied both experience increased depression and suicidal ideation as a result of their experience with being bullied and bullying another person. In fact, the bullies themselves have an "even higher rate of suicidal ideation than those being bullied." Psychologists explain that many bullies have psychological problems can can be causing the bullying. Looking back at my high school life, I'm trying to think if maybe the kids who bullied me were in a bad place emotionally.
Looking at the bully from a wider scope doesn't mean we excuse their behavior it just helps us understand their behavior. Bullies are humans too and understanding their behavior can inspire compassion.
Reading this article I wondered if my bullies felt the same way as I did; alone, depressed, worthless and tired. A few times I even felt like running away and hiding somewhere in the woods so that I wouldn't have to go back to school.
Bullies are hurtful for all sorts of reasons. If we take a step back and think about where this hostile behavior is coming from, maybe instead of avoiding them you might just be able to understand them. You never know until you try.
If you or anyone else you know is suicidal or needs help please visit the KIDS HELPLINE here.
Have a great week!
--Ruth Jackson
I found this article to be quite fascinating: Overcoming Bullying and Depression. While it is long, I'm only going to talk about the first few paragraphs in particular. Personally, I was surprised at the statistics and research results from Education.com. The article explains that the bully and the bullied both experience increased depression and suicidal ideation as a result of their experience with being bullied and bullying another person. In fact, the bullies themselves have an "even higher rate of suicidal ideation than those being bullied." Psychologists explain that many bullies have psychological problems can can be causing the bullying. Looking back at my high school life, I'm trying to think if maybe the kids who bullied me were in a bad place emotionally.
Looking at the bully from a wider scope doesn't mean we excuse their behavior it just helps us understand their behavior. Bullies are humans too and understanding their behavior can inspire compassion.
Reading this article I wondered if my bullies felt the same way as I did; alone, depressed, worthless and tired. A few times I even felt like running away and hiding somewhere in the woods so that I wouldn't have to go back to school.
Bullies are hurtful for all sorts of reasons. If we take a step back and think about where this hostile behavior is coming from, maybe instead of avoiding them you might just be able to understand them. You never know until you try.
If you or anyone else you know is suicidal or needs help please visit the KIDS HELPLINE here.
Have a great week!
--Ruth Jackson
Wednesday, October 22, 2014
Letting Go of Hatred
I want to thank Frankie, the co-founder of Nobul, who brought this particular TED Talk to my attention. There are quite a few TED Talks that speak to the topic of terrorism, but Zak's speech in particular, about overcoming the barriers he thought were impenetrable, is something worth listening to. Personally, I thought this was beyond powerful and courageous for him to do this.
Many people were taught to fear the "other,"people who were different from them, in their upbringing. Some people were told that Black people are less intelligent than white people, that people with disabilities are incapable of learning and that people from different religions than their own should be avoided. Negative stereotypes like these separate communities, groups and people from each other. I do my best not to categorize people and instead look at them as an individual. My Dad in particular tried really hard to make sure we didn't listen to "You Can't" because "We Can!" Each one of us is unique and when we push negative thoughts aside and hold on to positive people around us, we can indeed soar!
Zak said many things that resonated with me and almost brought me to tears. It's true that hatred demands so much energy while liking someone is easy in comparison. There will always be people who we don't like and that's alright, we don't have to like everyone, but we have to respect them. Growing up, I've watched teachers make fun of kids in the classroom who were different which negatively influenced the environment. I encourage everyone, especially those in authority, to really take a look at themselves and make the necessary changes to bring positivity into the space.
To the younger crowd, I hope what Zak said makes sense. Zak explains that peace is a choice and violence is a choice and each one of us is in control of what we choose. Spreading joy, peace, love, goodness and a host of other positive emotions and actions is far easier than finding new ways to hurt someone because of who they are. Like Zak's mother said, "I'm tired of hating people." Turn that around and make someone smile instead of hurt.
Enjoy your week!
--Ruth Jackson
Many people were taught to fear the "other,"people who were different from them, in their upbringing. Some people were told that Black people are less intelligent than white people, that people with disabilities are incapable of learning and that people from different religions than their own should be avoided. Negative stereotypes like these separate communities, groups and people from each other. I do my best not to categorize people and instead look at them as an individual. My Dad in particular tried really hard to make sure we didn't listen to "You Can't" because "We Can!" Each one of us is unique and when we push negative thoughts aside and hold on to positive people around us, we can indeed soar!
Zak said many things that resonated with me and almost brought me to tears. It's true that hatred demands so much energy while liking someone is easy in comparison. There will always be people who we don't like and that's alright, we don't have to like everyone, but we have to respect them. Growing up, I've watched teachers make fun of kids in the classroom who were different which negatively influenced the environment. I encourage everyone, especially those in authority, to really take a look at themselves and make the necessary changes to bring positivity into the space.
To the younger crowd, I hope what Zak said makes sense. Zak explains that peace is a choice and violence is a choice and each one of us is in control of what we choose. Spreading joy, peace, love, goodness and a host of other positive emotions and actions is far easier than finding new ways to hurt someone because of who they are. Like Zak's mother said, "I'm tired of hating people." Turn that around and make someone smile instead of hurt.
Enjoy your week!
--Ruth Jackson
Monday, September 29, 2014
What Can You do about Bullying?
Hello Everyone!
I don't know about you, but I had a crazy busy week. Everyday was filled with work with only a bit of "me" time. One positive I can spin out of my hectic life is that I came across some books dealing with overcoming bullies. Some are geared for Elementary kids and others I found are for middle schoolers and above. The book I want to talk about today is more around a second grade reading level, but has interesting and I believe, important points made by the author.
The book is called, Llama Llama and the Bully Goat. What I want to highlight is that Llama told someone about the issue he was having with Bully Goat and his life changed for the better. Sometimes we think that telling someone will only make things worse. I agree, that there are cases where if you trust the wrong person, your plan backfires. This is why trust is so vitally important. With bullying on the rise, more and more adults/supervisors and teachers are being made aware of what to watch for and how to help you and me.
I'll never forget the time when a police officer came to my aid when a group of students were causing trouble for me. This was at a horse camp when I was around the age of 10. For whatever reason, these kids decided I was to be their target for the summer. Once I made it known that I was not happy at all with how they were treating me, the police officer stepped in. From that day forward he looked out of me and those kids didn't bother me one more time. Instead, I was able to forge to new friendship and had a great rest of Horse Camp. Honestly, if I hadn't talked with that police officer, I would have been miserable.
So I encourage you to either read Llama Llama and the Bully Goat or actively find someone you can trust. Whether or not you're in a bad situation now, try to pick out someone you'd go to for help so when the time comes, you know exactly who to go to.
I hope you all have a fantastic week!
--Ruth Jackson
I don't know about you, but I had a crazy busy week. Everyday was filled with work with only a bit of "me" time. One positive I can spin out of my hectic life is that I came across some books dealing with overcoming bullies. Some are geared for Elementary kids and others I found are for middle schoolers and above. The book I want to talk about today is more around a second grade reading level, but has interesting and I believe, important points made by the author.
The book is called, Llama Llama and the Bully Goat. What I want to highlight is that Llama told someone about the issue he was having with Bully Goat and his life changed for the better. Sometimes we think that telling someone will only make things worse. I agree, that there are cases where if you trust the wrong person, your plan backfires. This is why trust is so vitally important. With bullying on the rise, more and more adults/supervisors and teachers are being made aware of what to watch for and how to help you and me.
I'll never forget the time when a police officer came to my aid when a group of students were causing trouble for me. This was at a horse camp when I was around the age of 10. For whatever reason, these kids decided I was to be their target for the summer. Once I made it known that I was not happy at all with how they were treating me, the police officer stepped in. From that day forward he looked out of me and those kids didn't bother me one more time. Instead, I was able to forge to new friendship and had a great rest of Horse Camp. Honestly, if I hadn't talked with that police officer, I would have been miserable.
So I encourage you to either read Llama Llama and the Bully Goat or actively find someone you can trust. Whether or not you're in a bad situation now, try to pick out someone you'd go to for help so when the time comes, you know exactly who to go to.
I hope you all have a fantastic week!
--Ruth Jackson
Monday, September 22, 2014
Choices
Hello everyone! Gorgeous morning and I just saw some yellow leaves!! Super stoked for Fall, I even reorganized my closet and sadly put my shorts away. Looking back it was a busy working summer, but I did manage to have some fun in between. Never did get to the beach though....NEXT TIME!
Today, I wanted to talk about a site I came across a couple weeks ago here. When perusing the website, I felt honored to read people's stories about bullying; both sad and courageous ones. Even though middle school was a long time ago, I still remember the words thrown at me and the looks on their faces. There are so many stories on here and love the fact that there is such a place for kids to share and feel welcomed versus the atmosphere school gives.
Personally, I believe one of the biggest hurdles when being bullied is not feeling alone. This site helps kids not only see that other people are going through the same thing, but hopefully gives them courage to stand up. If it weren't for my friends growing up, I honestly have no idea where I'd be.
I choose respect, love, kindness, generosity, inclusion and peace! What do you choose?
--Ruth Jackson
Today, I wanted to talk about a site I came across a couple weeks ago here. When perusing the website, I felt honored to read people's stories about bullying; both sad and courageous ones. Even though middle school was a long time ago, I still remember the words thrown at me and the looks on their faces. There are so many stories on here and love the fact that there is such a place for kids to share and feel welcomed versus the atmosphere school gives.
Personally, I believe one of the biggest hurdles when being bullied is not feeling alone. This site helps kids not only see that other people are going through the same thing, but hopefully gives them courage to stand up. If it weren't for my friends growing up, I honestly have no idea where I'd be.
I choose respect, love, kindness, generosity, inclusion and peace! What do you choose?
--Ruth Jackson
Wednesday, September 17, 2014
Anti-Bullying Weekend - September 12 - 14
The weather has made it's choice, it's "officially" Fall! I'm actually not happy about this. I was wearing my flip flops yesterday and my feet were FREEEZZINNG!! Oh, well. We all knew it was coming.
Anyways, I'm not sure how many of you know this, but this past weekend was designated as "Anti-Bullying Weekend" by Springfield Massachusetts's Mayor Domenic Sarno. This event is in memory of an 11-year-old boy who committed suicide in 2009 due to bullying. Along with the Carl Joseph Walker-Hoover Foundation, they see the importance of spreading the word about the impact of bullying. Awareness is the key to helping put an end to this disrespect of each other.
Over the past four years, the foundation has raised money to distribute scholarships to high school seniors across the country that have demonstrated efforts to combat bullying in their schools and communities. Leaders and Mayors in various states have gotten together to help each other build a safer community.
Mark this on your calendars for next year, but also keep in mind what bullying does. Everything has a consequence. What's the consequence of bullying? Carl's story is just one of many.
If you are a high school senior who would like to apply for the scholarship you can do so HERE! Remember BE A BUDDY NOT A BULLY.
More about the event and foundation.
--Ruth Jackson
Anyways, I'm not sure how many of you know this, but this past weekend was designated as "Anti-Bullying Weekend" by Springfield Massachusetts's Mayor Domenic Sarno. This event is in memory of an 11-year-old boy who committed suicide in 2009 due to bullying. Along with the Carl Joseph Walker-Hoover Foundation, they see the importance of spreading the word about the impact of bullying. Awareness is the key to helping put an end to this disrespect of each other.
Over the past four years, the foundation has raised money to distribute scholarships to high school seniors across the country that have demonstrated efforts to combat bullying in their schools and communities. Leaders and Mayors in various states have gotten together to help each other build a safer community.
Mark this on your calendars for next year, but also keep in mind what bullying does. Everything has a consequence. What's the consequence of bullying? Carl's story is just one of many.
If you are a high school senior who would like to apply for the scholarship you can do so HERE! Remember BE A BUDDY NOT A BULLY.
More about the event and foundation.
--Ruth Jackson
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